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    Musings, Humanity

    I’m super sensitive…possibly because my birthdate is #11….

    Ava’s watercolour painting….

     

    Ultimately, I want to be in conversation with those who understand me. Even if it’s just a piece of me.

    It’s rare that I get surprised – talking with someone with depth is always amazing.

    No one has left me stranded – every challenge was for my growth. I understand that now. Wish I’d realized that 20+ years ago.

    Harassment as a young woman = growth. Being disregarded for my entire 30’s = growth. Not putting up with any nonsense in my 40’s is priceless. I’ve won the lotto – coming back to my true self is a gift.

    Nothing is by chance. If we’re not meant to experience something then we just won’t be in that situation.

    How we choose to handle circumstances is up to us.

    This feeling of loneliness is stifling. Distancing my self from other people for my own emotional safety – for my entire life – has left me depleted. This world is a tough place for an empath. A Pisces, horse, empath. At least I have a master number for my birthday….

    I keep my heart in a vault. I’m in constant observance of my surroundings, and I know when to take part in a discussion, and when to hang back. I speak when I have thoughtful words that may elevate someone. Other times I just lay my understanding of an issue on the table and offer my unabashed advice – if I’ve gone through the same challenge. 

    Intuitively, I immediately read people and I know who to open up to – generally. Obviously I’ve had several times when I ignored the red flags to “make things work” and I’ve paid for those moments by giving up years of my life. No more. If someone says something that gives me a twinge of a red flag then I’ll promptly step out of the conversation. Without question.

    I’ve been told repeatedly that I’m strong by others who don’t believe that they too can make the hard decisions. We’re all the same essence and therefore we all can stand up for ourselves. Stop being afraid of change. A lot of the time what’s familiar to us is not actually in our best interest. Do others consider us as much as we do them? Perhaps not, so why stay? I’ve said before that actually being alone is better than feeling alone while with a partner.

    My fingers are aching from the stupid fatigue so I’m done for now. If anyone wants to be uplifted and potentially reconnect with their soul then listen to Rufus Wainwright. Enough said.