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    Musings

    A pause…for restructuring my life….

     

    Several things have been going on at the same time over the past few months. I won’t speak of them at this time other than to say that I’ve been diagnosed with chronic fatigue. I’m sore and worn out.

    Life is really hard right now, but then, isn’t it always a struggle in this delusionary world?

    I can no longer carry six bags of groceries plus Maddie on my back for the 2km walk back from the store to home…but I’ll have my strength again someday – I know I will. I’m resilient and my inner strength is in tact. My outer self needs to rest.

    I think kind thoughts to myself and hope that someday soon my body believes them enough to heal. It’s time to heal. Heal the mother wound. Heal the patriarchal wound. Heal the crossed boundaries of unwanted male attention from my youth. It’s time to let go of all of the hurts, and all of the misunderstandings. It’s time to forgive.

    I was resilient and strong before I knew this life. I will show my girls how to thrive. This isn’t supposed to be so hard. Love is the natural way. Acceptance. Simplicity.

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