Restoration. Can that word be applied to one’s life? I know I’m not a house…although I could restore one…I have skills. Perhaps the word “reclamation” suits my current life more.
Chronic fatigue is nothing that I would wish on another, and I’m determined to heal. Today has been a challenge – my arms and legs feel like heavy weights. No time for rest though…the house needs to remain spotless for viewings, meals prepared, children taught, and meditation time for me.
Over the next few months my focus will be to reestablish my truth. Restructuring my life to get back to myself. My self not my ego. Spirit. The ego is an impediment to over come – which is a serious understatement. A lifetime of keeping it in check. Ultimately, it’ll be defeated, but I have a lot of work ahead of me.
Constant forgiveness will get me to a place of removing the ego, but that’s a challenge. I’ll continue to forgive as I remember to, and eventually it’ll become second nature. Before I know it, I’ll remain unaffected by outside intensity.
My health will improve when I have space from heavy thoughts and the devious ego. Ego is so loud and I’m ready to tell it to shut the hell up. I’m too polite though, so I’ll quietly disengage from it. By the time it notices I’m gone it’ll be too late – I’ll have peace and it’ll be alone.
Hell and the ego go hand in hand. They’re one and the same.