If you’ve ever wondered if you’re spending your precious time with someone on the Cluster B Spectrum then I’ve created a list for you. Some clarification of general traits and actions of those on the spectrum – because 1 in 5 people in the whole world are on this spectrum.
Here’s my list:
* They insult you, then love bomb you, then slander your character, then say loving words to you, then call you names, and the abuse cycle continues with no end in sight….
* They’re incapable of honesty and lie about most things – especially their own actions.
* Gaslighting is a regular occurance.
* They change the history of events to suit their current mood, their version of said events, and their memory of what happened – so that they can always be the “victim”.
* Every time you verbally stand up for yourself, or try to explain your side of events/feelings, the Cluster B’s will see that as an attack on them. Then they’ll want to create a full out war…and they will.
* They’re incapable of empathy.
* Sometimes they have more than one personality – usually they have two.
* They deny affection and attention to those who they’re supposed to love (spouses, children, family).
* They’re selfish beyond measure – always self-centered.
* They target empaths to be in relationships with so that they have a constant source of compassion and someone to drain energy from – because they’re strengthened by draining other people.
* They show one version of themselves to the public, friends, co-workers and extended family. Their close family, children and spouses receive their wrath via the second personality.
* They need to make other people look “crazy” even though the Cluster B’s create all of the drama.
* They’re not supportive of their loved ones personal growth, ideas, goals, dreams, etc. They resent the existence of their loved ones outside of the moments when they’re receiving something from them. Then they resent them again.
* They tell other people that they’re the one with issues – nothing is ever the Cluster B’s fault. A Cluster B will never hold themselves accountable for anything. They always project their dysfunction onto those around them.
* They need to win – at all costs. Whether it’s within a conversation, an argument (which they started), a warped mind trip (exposing their messy mind), financially, and more.
* They’re not nurturing, their kindness is intentionally faked, and they’re judgmental of others.
* Their needs come first – with no exception.
* They have no ability for true self awareness, and they feel justified harming others with words, abuse and/or neglect.
* The most important thing to them is how good they look to others, and how they’re perceived.
Overall, they lack self worth, and deflect their self-hatred onto those who are in their lives. If any of what I’m pointing out here rings true for your experiences then just know that you’re strong enough to break the abuse cycle. It seems so daunting, and you may feel shame for not getting out of these relationships sooner, but today is a new day. It’s never too late to choose yourself and put yourself first for once.
If any Cluster B’s are reading this post – it’s not about you. Sorry to burst your extremely harmful sludge filled bubble. This is to help those in your life see the light and move on.